A Mother Lost: Year 2

Today marks two years since I lost my Mama. The best woman I ever knew, the woman who raised me, who taught me how to be strong and to roll with the punches. I'm a Mama's girl, through and through.

I was there, when she passed. Right there with her, just me and her. I'd never seen anyone die before. I wasn't prepared for it at all. She'd been sick all of my life and most of her own, though the cancer was a more recent development. I thought she could beat anything. She always had before. Things that would've killed her, should've killed her, didn't. She survived, and fought with all her strength to keep going.

There's so much I wish she could've been there for. Not just the big things, like my marriage or graduation, but the little things. The everyday things. Until she died, there wasn't a day that passed without us speaking. If we weren't together in person, we were talking on the phone.

Monday Musings: 3 Years Collared

The 3rd of April was the anniversary of my collaring in 2011. It's amazing to me that it's been 3 years. It feels like it can't have been that long, while at the same time it feels as if we've been together forever.

My collar is simple: a silver heart-shaped necklace which has my husband's initials on it to proclaim me his girl. It has only been removed for cleaning, and then placed back around my neck, but for the first full year of wearing it, it never left contact with my skin.

It's an important symbol, my collar. It gives me peace and security. A sense of my Owner, always with me, even when we're apart. When life is chaos around me, it's a physical reminder of my place. He also gave it to me at an important time in our lives. You see, he was going to collar me at a kink event, a national one that we'd planned on attending for months. Now, I knew about the event. I had no clue about the collar.

Thursday Thirteen: My 13 Recent Fascinations

Thursday Thirteen is a weekly meme with a simple theme: each Thursday you blog a list of 13 things. What kind of things? Any kind! Just come up with a list theme and run with it!

It's been awhile since my last Thursday Thirteen. Sorry! My day job has been a bit consuming, and that's left little time for the kind of blogging I want to do.

So, this week is about my current fascinations. I get very focused on certain things, and they tend to hold my interest for a good amount of time.

1. Natural products - I'm exploring the use of products made from all natural ingredients, with no synthetics. My skin, while it doesn't mark for anything from floggers or rope, is very sensitive to soaps and perfumes. From my scalp to my toes, it's not thrilled with most products. I've recently found a couple of places worth exploring, and now I'm ordering all sorts of samples!

2. Stitch 'n Bitch Crochet - I finally got this book in from the library. I've gotten 3 hats and a scarf done, and well! But I still don't know the crochet code, that language all crochet patterns are written in. So, this book is helping me learn!

3. Queer as Folk - It's on Netflix! Huzzah! Hubby and I are watching it, and it's been fantastic. The show is hot and hilarious and dramatic.

4. Editing - I know I wrote about it on Monday, but printing out my previously published tale has been fantastic. I'm having a ton of fun making changes and adding more descriptive content!

5. Dachshunds - Well, specifically my doxie. He turned 14 a bit over a week ago, and I'm trying to spend as much time with him as I can. But also, cute doxie videos online! Go look, they're hilarious!

6. Rope - Well, hubby created some "rope stocks" on the bed which actually serve to hold me in place. I'm a bit of an escape artist, so that's saying something! Now to add them at the top of the bed, and then apply toys.

7. Smashwords - Oh, Smashwords, how do I love thee? *grins* It's very nice to see that my free stories are being read, or at the very least downloaded a lot! Nearly 400 downloads and counting!

8. Music - I've been listening to more music lately, and I must say, it gives me a buzz. Especially happy, bouncy, exciting music. It encouraged me to do research on whether one can get high off of music, and apparently, one can!

9. Kink Events - This relates to rope, in that hubby and I went to a kink event awhile ago, and it was really nice. We're planning on more for March, and I really look forward to it.

10. Star charts - Yes, star charts, like you get for elementary school kids. Hubby and I have been using them, partly for power exchange reasons, partly because it's really nice to keep track of the accomplishments, small and large. Get work done? Star! Do the household stuff you really hate to do? Star! Get enough stars? Let's make sure to set aside time/money/whatever for this little thing we like. Focusing on the positives has been a really good daily exercise!

11. Aussie fiction - When I read, I get a bit of a movie in my head. I'm having a lot of fun reading new author Jessie L. Star, and plan to read more Aussie and Kiwi fiction to get my fix of that accent and word usage in my head.

12. Self-publishing - I've not yet really done much in the vein of self-publishing. The closest I've come is having my free stories on Smashwords. With my experience on there, I'm considering it more and more for some of my harder-to-place tales!

13. Branding and body art - I can't afford a really good quality tattoo as of yet, but I do want to get my one piece of body art - my brand - touched up, perhaps on the 1 year anniversary of receiving it, or thereabouts. I also am in the process of writing a post about my brand for one of my Friday Deviance posts. Be on the lookout!

There you have it. My interests-cum-obsessions for the past few weeks! What about you guys? Any new or renewed interests recently?

Monday Musings: Owned by a Dachshund

As you see by the title of this blog, I am currently owned by a dachshund. Actually, my entire family is owned by the dachshund. He has decided to write today's post, so...here we go!

My humans are are many things to me. Cuddle partners. Bringers of food. Holders of the leash as I walk them. Horrible pullers of the leash when I am interested in a sniff across the street and they're going, "CAR!" Whatever that is.

Their schedule revolves around me, which is as it should be. I am older distinguished, and will be turning 14 next month. I insist on a proper brushing to keep my coat nice and shiny. I look like a dog half my age! Seriously, people comment on how young I look in such an admiring fashion that I may, MAY, allow them to pet me.

I likes to sit next to my humans whenever possible. They prop me up and provide cuddling services. Also, I do not sleep, I rest my eyes. I do NOT snore, despite what my owners may claim, I just have loud breathing.

I expects my meals on time, and I shall greet each one by leaping from the chair I graciously share and racing to the bowl. My server may then leave me to eat in peace.

I enjoy long walks through the neighborhood, and do my part to keep my humans in better shape, leading them on non-linear, wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey walks. I really do take good care of them.

Finally, at night, they vacate my bed for good and give me a nicely folded cover to burrow into. My humans are good, and I give them the pleasure of my presence, the structure of my schedule, every day. I must be the best owner ever to exist!

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*ahem* So, there you have it. A day in the life of a dachshund who owns humans.

Are any of you guys owned by your pets? What sorts of things do they have you do? We must band together!

Christmas Eve and Anticipation

Anticipation is delicious. The heart races, attention sharpens, excitement brings boatloads of energy and enthusiasm!

Christmas, with decorating the tree, candlelight services, and of course the gifts, has always been a time of anticipation. After Thanksgiving, when December begins, it's like a countdown. Decorations come out, there's a radio station dedicated to the music of the season, and the bell people come out of the woodwork in front of every store.

Christmas Eve was the height of it all. The night before, when the thrill had built over each passing day, the pile of gifts growing beneath the tree, the curiosity of it all just couldn't be denied. Shaking boxes, making guesses as to what was what. It was a family game to figure out what everyone was getting.

We got to open one present on Christmas Eve. It was like whetting our appetites for the next day, giving some satisfaction, but still...there were the rest of them! Just waiting. And of course, try getting us to sleep when we got home after the midnight candlelight service.

Still, we waited for the gifts until the next day, when we could really enjoy them. The next day, it was all about ripping up paper, exploring our gifts and our imaginations, and being incredibly thankful that we could experience it all together.


This year I'm thankful for the people I have in my life, each and every one! Love is the true gift this year. Well, that and the Doctor Who Christmas special, but...I'm a geek that way!

What are your Christmas Eve traditions? Do you agree about the anticipation that precedes Christmas?

Merry Christmas to everyone who celebrates it! May you have joy on this day.